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Jennifer E. Thomas
j3nny3lf
...... .:::.:.:


Waterfalls
It's almost like there are these periods where our relationship is smooth and steady, and then there are times when it's like standing on the edge of this gorgeous, wonderful waterfall and just letting yourself drop, knowing that there's a safe pool of water ready to catch you at bottom. You take the plunge and you're in wayyyy over your head, but oh man, it's exhilarating, it's breathtaking, it's just incredible and you feel better than you ever have before and the water is cool and refreshing and exactly what you needed.

Sam is my waterfall.

- LJ entry from 8/2005





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June 2017
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Jennifer E. Thomas [userpic]
Jenn went crazy again...

I got home late this morning from spending five days on the psych ward.

All of the hassles with Sean finally got to me, and my meds needed adjusting anyways, so it was time to check in for a short stay and ensure my stability. I have a feeling this will happen off and on over the rest of my life.

Apparently they determined during my stay that I am NOT bipolar. I have Major Depressive Disorder, just like Sam does, and, of course, I'm still Borderline. Just like Sam. His and Hers Mental Illnesses! Yeehaw! ;)

Seriously, though, I feel a lot better. I see bright things on the horizon again instead of doom and gloom, woe and death. This is a Good Thing .

Sorry to anybody who was worried, this is kind of the way it is with a mentally ill friend. :)

Where the hell am I?: HOME HOME HOME!
Borderline symptom of the day: optimisticoptimistic
Comments

AUNTIE!!!!!!!!!!! *flings self at you and smooshes you in a huge hug*

^_^ Hi!

You have a sick mind? Whodathunk!

I'm glad you are feeling better.

See my reply to farmleaf, below. :)

Glad you're home! I had just talked to you Wednesday night and you sounded great, so it caught me by surprise.

Glad to see you again - I was fixing to get worried.

"I have a feeling this will happen off and on over the rest of my life."

I can so relate. Those of us who suffer from depression have a 70% risk of reoccurance with every episode. So far, I have had 12 episodes. As a matter of fact, I'm in treatment now. I never even considered hiring a psychiatrist or going to a psych facility until things got so bad this year. I wonder, if I had gotten treatment much earlier, would I have suffered so much and so frequently?

I'm glad you got the help you needed. I know how it is to live with people who have disabilities. Some days it can drain the life outta me. Which of course worsens my illness. But as you must know, we are not just "depression"--we have depression, just like some people have heart disease or hypertension. Like any chronic illness, we're going to have to be wary and keep up our maintenance for the rest of our days.

I'm glad you're feeling better. Good luck!

welcome back :) *hug*

glad you're feeling better

Good to see you back and feeling better!

I'm glad you were able to get stuff worked out again. Not bipolar? How long have you had the bipolar diagnosis?? Weird. But yeah, his and hers matching mental illnesses, the joy.

Major YAY for feeling better!

The bipolar diagnosis was given to me about four years ago by a doctor who had seen me one time when she made said diagnosis.

The doctor who changed the diagnosis is my regular psychiatrist whom I have been seeing for about a year now. He has been saying for a while that he wasn't too sure about the bipolar diagnosis, and that he would have me under close observation should I need hospitalization again.

So I spent five days being watched like a hawk during my waking hours, and yesterday before he released me he said that he felt that I have MDD, not BPAD, and that my Borderline Personality Disorder complicates that just enough that somebody who has seen me only on monthly or so office visits could easily confuse that combination with Bipolar II. (Which was my diagnosis, very low lows, not so high manias).

Anyways, that's how he sorted that out. I'm pretty sure he's right. Either way, the treatment is pretty much the same.

*hugs*

Well they're all quacks. ;-p I too struggle with MDD, to the point where I can get disability for it. Chilling to read from my psychologist and psychiatrist that "She will need some sort of support system financially for the rest of her life" in the letters I had to send to disability, but worth it to have monthly stability, I work when I can and I let God take care of the rest.

Glad you are doing better. Never feel ashamed for who you are. That's an important lesson I am just now learning in the process, maybe a dozen, probably more major episodes later. (I've been hospitalized four times now for it)