February 25th, 2009

misc - fluffy

Winter has turned

Today's high will be 79 and tomorrow's will be 84.

If this is like previous winters here, winter is going running.

I need to buy an air conditioner for my bedroom. The old one is no good.
misc - fluffy

Thoughts and randomness

I've got the blues today, unsure why.

I think I've been messing up my meds again, as I mentioned the other day either here or on FB. I wish there was some way I could remember to take them all the time. I've got one of those beepie pill boxes, but half the time I can't hear the stinking thing, and it's too bulky to carry around. Some website sells these watches, but they're $100 for the ugliest thing on the planet, I'd never wear it. Gotta figure out SOMETHING though!

Sean and Ian are both grounded again. They were lighting dandelion puffs on fire in our very very dry back yard full of very very dry grass. There's currently a burn ban on in city limits, too. I just don't know what to do with them any more. It seems like if we don't detail every single exact thing that is not allowed, they do it, and pull the excuse of "You never told us not to light dandelion puffs on fire, you just told us don't play with matches!" Oh FFS. These kids are not mentally challenged, and they aren't so autistic that they can't extrapolate. Grrrr. They can sure manage to sort out what they can and can't do when it's what they want. Sometimes I wanna take a belt to their asses. Good thing I don't do corporal punishment, I swear.

On the happy side, I got myself a coffee plunger last week at Ross for $6. ZOMG it makes killer coffee. Doesn't hurt that I got myself a pound of Dunkin' Donuts coffee to use with it. Yummmmm.

Getting ready to use that tax refund to pay some bills ahead so that we can live more comfortably each month than if I don't pay ahead. It's a nice feeling to get an electric bill that tells you that you have a credit balance and zero due. Even nicer when it's the rent statement.

Another thing I must remember to buy are Sean and Ian's bicycles. Their granddaddy sent checks for those at Christmas, but there were no decent bikes at Walmart right then. There's some good ones now, for about $90 each, so off to Walmart I go with Kris when the refund comes. Helmets and locks, too, of course.

Still waiting on the Community Based Alternatives program with Medicaid. It will take a few months to kick in, but when it kicks in, it will rock my universe in a major big way. I'll be able to get my teeth done, get a new motorized wheelchair (the one Chief Grube gave me is starting to fall apart here and there), and I'll have two other things: a housekeeper/aide for 20 hours a week, and a visiting nurse once a week to help me with my wound care and medications, etc. So that's good.

I'll be going to the Bay Area in May for Amy's graduation exercises. Anybody want to get together? I'll be there for about a week surrounding May 28.
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misc - fluffy

Ash Wednesday

Today was my first Ash Wednesday as a non-Catholic. Did it feel any different?

No, it didn't. I thought that it would, but it was just as deep and meaningful as last year in the Catholic church.

We heard a sermon by Nancy DiMarco (Rocky is out of town with his wife, visiting both sets of their parents) about disciplining ourselves for prayer and reflection during Lent and always. It was a very interesting sermon, and I must ask her for a copy of it.

We did a responsorial psalm, the standard 51st. I wasn't crazy about the musical setting for that one, I far prefer this (which is also probably my all time favorite worship song, since I first heard it in 1980):



But choice of music isn't the point. The point is in the message, which is awareness of my own sins, confessing them to God, and true repentance.

This will be the first Lent in nearly ten years that I have not gone to confession with a priest. That will be strange. I still am not fully comfortable with the idea that I don't need a priest to absolve me of my sin, that God Himself does that, has, in fact, already done that. It comes down to learning to trust in God, not a church organization.

This Lenten season it is my intention to deepen my understanding of God and what He wills for me. To deepen my relationship with Him through prayer and study of my Bible. To examine myself deeply, truly repent of my sins both past and present, and seek forgiveness for all of it. To start fresh and clean.

That will be my Lenten sacrifice. I'm not giving up something tangible. I'm giving up taking it all for granted, instead.

May this Lent bring everybody closer to God.